It's almost a month, my (uneven) swelling has come down a lot. My perception tells me that my right side still has about 15% left, and my left side 30%. Okay, it's enough that people don't stare.
But you know, whenever I look in the mirror, I can't help but feel a little down cast and depressed when I know and see that my face is still rather asymmetrical. I'm not talking about the asymmetries that is known only to the ruler, but those that can be seen by the naked eye. It frustrates me having to know that I did something about it, only to see that it's still not perfect. It's like a thorn in the eye to the perfectionist within me. I hope I'm not deluding myself by saying that it's just the uneven swelling. :|
Up till now, I don't think any doctor or nurse has commented that things are going really well (I mean, aside from the would healing and swell reduction) or that I look good (not that I'm fishing for compliments, don't be mistaken). Why do I keep getting the feeling that things are not going as ideally as it should be?. Maybe I'm just being over sensitive; maybe I'm over thinking. I hope I'm just having another one of those bad days.
Well, on a chirpier note, I can open 1.5 fingers wide now! And I ate kuay chap yesterday! Accompanied by the lou neng and tau kwa. Yum :))
It's only normal to have bad days. I've looked in the mirror many times and also wonder if something isn't quite the way it should be because i smile awkward and it seems as tho my underbite is still there. Then i told myself that it's too early to judge our looks when we're only 3 - 4 weeks post surgery. So cheer up! Just wanted you to know i understand what you're feeling cos i feel it too. :)
ReplyDeletehaha aw, thanks for the encouragement :) just clinging on to the hope that things will only get better!
DeleteHey girl, I stumbled on your blog through hy's. :D Looks like you did your surgery with Dr Tan just 4 days after me. :D Hang in there... that psychological and emotional side of recovery is very real. Just be patient with your body as it recovers. I battled depression last week too, and panicked at my 1-month post-op day. Chances are, though, that you're really recovering fine and are just panicking as your body is seemingly taking "so long" to heal. :) Are you in the FB Jaw Surgery group? They have a lot of great people there who can offer some encouragement when you need it.
ReplyDeletehello! really nice to meet you :D cool! did you do your surgery with Dr Tan as well? agreed, the emotional stuff can sometimes be such a roller coaster (or is it just me..) especially when improvements become far and few. I hope you're feeling better already! nope, do you have the link to the group?
DeleteThis is it: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2224052305/. :) And no, you're not the only one. A lot of people go through it. One day at a time. :) <3 Claire Ariela
DeleteCool, thanks! I'll check it out! Yup yup :))
DeleteHey babe. Don't worry about the asymmetrical face right now! You're only day 30 into surgery (32 days now tho). I had surgery done on 4 June and experienced asymmetrical face whereby the right side of my face was more swollen. I'm now at day 51 and I've a pretty even face now.
ReplyDeleteI used to think a lot when I was at your stage, because we are risking our lives/future for this surgery and we cannot afford any setbacks. It's ok to go through this "depression" stage but don't let it affect you too much ok.
Give yourself a couple more weeks. Jaw surgery is a huge surgery, it takes 3 months for swelling to go off (completely).
All the best to you! Wishing you a speedy recovery.
C
http://byeunderbite.blogspot.sg/
Hi C, thanks for dropping by. (I've a new friend, yey!) Well, hope that the asymmetry is nothing skeletal haha. Thank you for the words of comfort. I know, life still has to go on haha. Don't worry, I won't let it get to me too much :))
DeleteMay you have a speedy recovery too!
Popped by your blog for a bit. Hope that your tongue regains some sensitivity soon. All the best! :))